Good Listening

Recently my pastor posted Listening on his blog. I found it interesting, probably because I do more listening than talking. I have his permission to share it with you here:

“An eighty year-old grandfather went to his daughter’s home for Sunday dinner. When the meal was over, he announced he was going to take a walk through the neighborhood. ‘I’ll be back in fifteen minutes,' he said. Two hours passed before he returned. ‘Sorry I’m late,’ he said upon his return, ‘but I stopped to talk to an old friend and he just wouldn’t stop listening.’

“How good are you at listening? Have you ever thought about listening being a ministry? Sometimes we fail to appreciate the significance of just being a good listener. There is an old saying that says, ‘A self-centered person doesn’t feel the time is being used wisely unless the air is filled with the melodious sound of his own voice.’ Know anyone like that? Preachers sometimes are the worst offenders. We just think people always enjoy hearing us talk. Someone once said, ‘Remember, God gave us two ears and only one mouth.’

“There is a real ministry to be offered to someone who is hurting. It is called a ministry of presence. It means that you go to someone who is hurting without all the answers to their problems. It means you realize you don’t know why something happened to them, or what they should do now. Sometimes just being there without saying a word – not giving opinions or advice – can provide great comfort to that person who is hurting. By your being there you are saying that you care and that you share in the other person’s pain. Too often with the best of intentions we say things like, ‘I know what you’re going through’ when we don’t. Again, sometimes just being there is what is needed.”

I liked the idea of a “ministry of presence.” You really can make a difference just being there for someone. Yes, listening is a viable ministry. As my pastor's blog asks, "How good are you at listening?"

Some quotes to enjoy . . .

"Don't underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can't hear, and not bothering." Winnie the Pooh

"A good listener is a silent flatterer." unknown

"If you spend more time asking appropriate questions rather than giving answers or opinions, your listening skills will increase." Brian Koslow

"Listening is a magnetic and strange thing, a creative force. The friends who listen to us are the ones we move toward. When we are listened to, it creates us, makes us unfold and expand." unknown

"Everything has been said before, but since nobody listens we have to keep going back and beginning all over again." Andre Gide

"I like to listen. I have learned a great deal from listening carefully. Most people never listen." Ernest Hemingway

"A good listener is not only popular everywhere, but after a while he gets to know something." Wilson Mizner

I found the above picture at a Hospice Facility close to home. The pictures below are of some farms I found while I was out and about.